Thursday 15 May 2014

Why I Feel Guilty for Being Pregnant Again

It's not often I really write about my feelings but I just wanted to share to see if I am truly crazy or how I'm feeling is normal. 

I love being a mummy. C is amazing. Best child ever. Which is why I wanted another baby. That feeling of having a child of your own who loves you unconditionally and relies on you for everything is fantastic but I can't help but feel a little guilty. 

There are ten years between myself and my sister. We've never been close because the age gap is just too much. If anything, I think I parent her a bit now! I knew I didn't want a huge age gap between my kids. C will be just turning 2 when the baby is due so I think that's a great little age difference. 

Now that I'm pregnant, I can't help but think, "C has never had to share us before. Now another little baby is going to come along. What if we leave him out? What if he gets jealous?" Even when I'm buying things in preparation for the baby coming, I feel really guilty if I don't buy him something too. I play with him and think "he's going to be so disappointed when mummy can't play with him all the time because she needs to feed his little sister or change her nappy". 

I will try my best to include him in everything so that he doesn't feel left out. I've read a few tips online. When C comes to see us in the hospital after we've had the baby, she will not be in either mine or Chris's arms so that we are free to cuddle him. We will also buy him a present from his little sister. When changing the babys nappy, I will include him by asking if he could get me the nappy and bring it to me. Just so he feels like he's helping out. 

I find that I'm getting a little annoyed at myself for being so excited about this baby. It's like it's I'm worried that I'll think that C is old news now we've got a new baby coming. Which is crazy!

Is this normal thinking? And do you have any other tips I could use to make the transition from only child to big brother easier? 
2 comments on "Why I Feel Guilty for Being Pregnant Again"
  1. I used to think the same too when I was pregnant with my youngest...My eldest took on the role of a big sister and loved it! I kept her involved and she helped changing the nappies, feeding and bathing my youngest....I always made sure to make time for her when her sister was sleeping....It's not as scary as you think! hugs x

  2. This is totally normal! I still feel guilty now but you will be surprised how well they adapt to having a baby brother/sister, My eldest loved helping out I even woke up to her doing a night feed once (obviously dad was helping) she showed so much interest in her little sister and loved giving her a bottle and helping out as much as she can, I done a big sister hamper up for my eldest that was jam packed with things to do so in the first week or so of being home she was kept super busy and felt very important with her big sister top and badge, We also took her out alone for a big sister trip to the aquarium, you will be surprised that you soon wonder what it was like to only have the one x